KITCHEN
WIZARDRY 1:
HOW
TO GET WATER OUT OF OIL
This is the first ouf our
so-called Kitchen Wizardry articles. They will teach you
some very useful things, and you'll be surprised how many
nice and interesting things you can do in your kitchen!
Now, on to the work: It has
probably happened to you that you have guests in your
house, but no water. Of course, your guests like to drink
water, so you're in a bit of a trouble. It is
scientifically proved that the lack of regular water
supply (i.e. at least once in two hours) leads human
individues to nervous and potentially dangerous
behaviour. We will also assume that you don't have time
to go to the nearest store to buy some water. So, what
can you do to save your house from the furious guests?
Luckily, almost every kitchen
has large quantities of oil. So, naturally, you will use
oil to get water. This requires some knowledge of
chemistry, biology and mathematics, but I doubt you will
have problems understanding it.
First of all, it is important to
know that around 30% of any oil is actually water. The
other 70% are minerals, carbon-monoxide and similar
things. So, roughly, five liters of oil will translate
into one liter of water. One liter of water should be
enough for two hours (presuming that you have only one
guest, if there are more you will have to have more oil).
Apart from oil, you also need to have some sugar, salt,
carrot, cucumber and some sulphuric acid.
First you put one liter of oil
in the freezer. The other four liters you should pour in
a cauldron or something. Put it on the strong fire and
wait for five minutes.
You will notice that due to the
heat the large percentage of minerals has expired. Some
harder minerals are not likely to disappear without a
fight, so you will have to use salt and sugar. Mix three
coffee spoons of sugar with one spoon of salt, and add a
drop of sulphuric acid. This creates a material known as Carbon-Dioxide.
Carbon-Dioxide interacts with hard minerals, connects
with them and gives us - WATER! Yes, that's right! It is
probably one of the coolest things in chemistry to create
the water this way.
Now we need to get rid of the
carbon-monoxide and other materials from the oil. How are
we going to do that? Easily: First of all, those
"other materials" are things like fluor,
methane and other elements from group 5 of the Periodic
system. Since they all belong in the same group as
carbon-monoxide, it is natural that they will act
similarly to it. A neat way to "extract" those
materials is to combine them with natrium peroxide. When
combined with natrium peroxide, these materials are
simply going to transform to pure oxygen, which will
elevate from the substance! And how are we going to get
the natrum peroxide? Easily! We need to get some natrium
and some peroxide.
As we know from our chemistry
lessons, carrot contains lots and lots of natrium, while
cucumber contains some peroxide. We will cut the carrot
and cucumber into small pieces and put them into one
bowl. Add some salt (as a catalist) and mix with a spoon.
Natrium from the carrot will interact with peroxide from
the cucumber and create the mighty natrium peroxide.
Natrium peroxide is a solid brown material, so you won't
have trouble extracting it from the carrot-cucumber
mixture.
Now, all you have to do is add
some natrium peroxide to the oil. It will combine with
those materials we want to extract. We will get some pure
oxygen, which is going to float away. However, not all of
natrium peroxide is going to interact. What happens to
the rest of it? Well, since natrium peroxide is pretty
unstable, it will interact with hydrogen from the air and
transform into ozone, O-3. Ozone will naturally elevate
from the surface.
Keep in mind that during this
whole time the cauldron was on fire (to provide the heat,
a catalist). Naturally, large part of oil has boiled
away, and what we're left with is a pure and simple ONE
LITER OF WATER (give or take a few drops). Neat, eh?
Well, that's it for now, stay
tuned for more kitchen wizardry articles!
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